The longer we choose to hold on to grievances and wrong doings the more emotional pain we allow to linger in our hearts and mind. Imagine being rushed to a doctor and they take out the bullet that was shot at you. It is a miracle that you are alive. Then as soon as you get enough strength you take and look at the bullet and then shove it right back into the whole. That sounds crazy! It is exactly what happens if we do not forgive and release the bullets from our past wounds.
Psalms 55:4
"My heart is sore pained within me; and the terrors of death are fallen upon me."
I write this to you without any illusions of the task of letting these things go. It will hurt. It will take time and just when you think you are going to be OK, something will remind you of the pain. Then, if you are not careful, the whole wave of grief can topple you and bring you right back to the starting point. What I am learning from situations in my own life is to make sure there is someone to talk to when those thoughts and feelings begin to rise. Make sure you have a trusted friend or counselor that can hear your thoughts and allow your heart to bleed without allowing you to jump off the deep end. It is in those moments that some of the biggest mistakes in life are made if not tempered with good friends who help point you back to the foot of the cross.
Here are a few easy steps to take when you are feeling the waves of grief and pain…
1. Breath
Your brain must get proper oxygen to think clearly. When you are upset your breathing is strained and will always alter your ability to walk in wisdom.
2. Slow down
When we get upset we say things like, “Fine then!”, “Well then I will just…” and we begin making rash decisions that will usually bring negative consequences not only to you but to those loved ones that surround you.
3. Pray
There is nothing more important than to run to God. Do what ever you have to do to get away and spend a few moments, hours, or days with God. It is crucial that you find Jesus in your situation before you make any judgments about the situation. Jesus is truth and will bring a light into the darkness that will always change how you look at what is in front of you.
4. Read and recite God’s word
It will be natural for you to want to run around and hear what everyone thinks about your situation and pain. When looking for wisdom it is important that you are first anchored in the Word of God. He will keep you on course in the fiercest of storms and help you decipher the advice that others are giving you. This world will try to pull you hard enough to loosen the anchor. DO NOT LET IT! God's word is truly the only thing that will keep you from wandering around lost in the darkness.
5. Talk to a trusted friend or counselor
It is crucial that you find a way to get the thoughts out of your head. If you do not have someone to talk to then write it down somewhere safe. If you leave it in your head it will begin to bounce around like a rubber ball that will only cause more damage and pain. Find a way to get it out of your head so you can look at your thoughts at face value and not through the lenses of the many emotions stirring inside.
I am here to proclaim to you that healing is possible and it will not always be as difficult as it may feel right now. God has His plan in motion to bring healing to you and to your situation. Your job is simply to run to Him and trust. If you are brave enough to take that first step, He will bring to your aid all of the resources of heaven to see you cared for. He loves you!
1 Peter 5:10-11
And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To him be the power forever and ever. Amen.
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