A Troubled Heart

Luke 19:41

As he approached Jerusalem and saw the city, he wept over it 42and said, "If you, even you, had only known on this day what would bring you peace—but now it is hidden from your eyes…

This week my heart weeps for some of the things I have seen and heard in the lives of those around me. It is so difficult to look around and see people making decisions that cause pain and hurt--not only to themselves, their families, their friends--but also to the heart of God. My quota has been filled and is now overflowing with the stories of God’s people being distracted from the truth and buying into the lies this world and Satan are telling. For those of you reading this who claim to know the Lord as your personal Savior, please read and evaluate where you are at. If you are currently standing where you should, then praise God! But if, when you look around, you become aware that you are not on the right path and not facing the correct direction, please take some time with the Lord and ask Him to forgive you and bring you back to where you should be. God’s plans for us are so much better than what this world and its lies are offering to you.

Listed below are six thoughts that have been bouncing around my mind all week long. 

The Difficult Truth

1. Sin is always pleasurable for a season!

But when it is all said and done, sin will return to demand from you more than you can ever pay. Do not be fooled!

2. Do not trust your feelings!

Though feelings are very important they can also be very misleading. Before you react to your feelings take a few steps to make sure they are leading you down the right path. Bring your feelings to the Lord, share them with someone who will hold you accountable, and know that tomorrow there is a great chance that you will feel differently; so maybe wait until then to jump off the cliff.

3. What you do affects everyone around you!

Most people think that their little sins have no effect on anyone else. Yet that is the farthest thing from the truth. Every decision, both small and large, will either bring life or death to those who surround us--especially to those who are closest to us.

 

The Wonderful Truth

1. God will lead you out of the mud!

There is a way out of that situation that you are in, or that habit that has you in bondage. Jesus made the way! He is waiting for you to cry out to Him and surrender. 

2. God has made a way for you to be clean once more!

Jesus came and died for our sins, and now we do not have to walk around burdened by our shortcomings.

3. There is nothing that you can do to mess up the love that God has for you!

No matter where you are at and what decisions you are swimming in, God loves you. The book of Revelation tells us that Jesus stands at the door and knocks, waiting for us to open the door. He is knocking on your door and wants to help bring life where there was death. All you need to do is call to Him!

 

Dear Lord,

Today, I pray for my friends and for myself. I pray that we do not lose focus and will strive to serve you. For those who are married, please keep their hearts soft towards one another. Help them serve each other and not become selfish. For those who are parents, help them be patient with their children and remember that we are to be the example for them. For each of us at our jobs, please help us be the best employees as we consistently represent you. And for those people that are watching us to see if our faith is genuine, Lord, please help us shine for you. If there is anyone reading this that needs to make a 180 degree turn and change their ways, help them feel your love and guidance. Be with your people, as it seems that the enemy is finding ways to enter in and wreak havoc. I pray for your protection.

 

In the name of Jesus!

Amen

Even If...

Do you ever find yourself saying this about situations in life?

Even if…

Even if he or she is not honest… I will be!

Even if everyone else has decided to jump off the proverbial bridge… I won’t!

Even if I get scared… I won’t run!

Even if I don’t understand… I will trust!

Even if they are all crooked… I will walk straight!

Even if it isn’t fair… I will forgive!

Even if it costs me my life… I will not bow!

All of these are wonderful statements and promises of faith. But what happens when it is time to face one of those horribly difficult situations that life produces and, no matter what you pray or how you beg, you are not only asked to continue to face the fire but are also being forced to climb into the furnace?

In the book of Daniel, the Bible tells us an amazing story of how three young men chose to not bow their knee to any but God, and in turn was forced to literally walk into a furnace. To some, it may be a surprise to learn that Jesus was sitting in the furnace with them and that, because of His presence, the flames didn’t scorch them. Yes, that part of the story is miraculous and is the part that would be the climax if a movie were being written. But there was a conversation that took place before the flames ever licked their flesh. This conversation took place between the three young faithful Jewish boys and Nebuchadnezzar, the nemesis King that was demanding of them worship or their very lives. These young men had a choice to acquiesce to the demands before them and do what the crowds were doing, or they could choose to follow through with their promise of the “even if…”

 

Daniel 3:16-18

Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to the king, "O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. 17 If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. 18 But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up."

 

The part of this story that hits me square in the middle of my heart has nothing to do with the fact that they are facing the fire, as we all will have fires to face. It is not that there are evil men and woman who will cause pain and fear, as we are all capable of becoming the ones inflicting that kind of destruction. But the difficult part for me was the part where they were going serve their God even if He did not rescue them. They were sure that God had the power to do so. They were staking their whole existence on the fact that God was able. But even if God did not use His power to save them, they would not bow. Now we are dealing with an amazing subject. Why would God not use all of His immutable power, His infallible wisdom, and all of His omniscient knowledge to assure that these faithful young men did not have to walk through the fire?

 

In this story, He did save them; but for every story we read about Him stepping in and altering the situation, there are many where He does not. Why is this so? In truth, we will never have a good answer to this question until we meet Him face to face and understand more than we do while in this broken human form. But scripture gives us a glimpse of His purpose. And for now a glimpse will have to be enough.

 

1. To Bring Maturity and Completion

James 1:2-4

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

 

2. God is untameable and does not work according to our plan

Just think of this awesome song we sing based out of Genesis 1, Psalm 19, and Psalm 150.

 

“Indescribable.” Written by Laura Story

From the highest of heights to the depths of the sea

Creation’s revealing Your majesty

From the colors of Fall the the fragrance of Spring

Ev’ry creature unique in the song that it sings

All Exclaiming

 

Indescribable uncontainable

You placed the stars in the sky and you know them by name

You are an amazing God

All powerful untamable

Awestruck, we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim

You are amazing, God

 

Who has told ev’ry lightning bolt where it should go

Or seen heavenly storehouses laden with snow?

Who imagined the sun and gives source to its light

Yet conceals it to bring us the coolness of night?

None can fathom

________________ 

From the highest of heights to the depths of the sea

Creation’s revealing Your majesty

From the colors of Fall the the fragrance of Spring

Ev’ry creature unique in the song that it sings

All Exclaiming

 

3. Worship comes in many forms

Hebrews 11:32-40

32And what more shall I say? I do not have time to tell about Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, David, Samuel and the prophets, 33who through faith conquered kingdoms, administered justice, and gained what was promised; who shut the mouths of lions, 34quenched the fury of the flames, and escaped the edge of the sword; whose weakness was turned to strength; and who became powerful in battle and routed foreign armies. 35Women received back their dead, raised to life again. Others were tortured and refused to be released, so that they might gain a better resurrection. 36Some faced jeers and flogging, while still others were chained and put in prison. 37They were stoned[f]; they were sawed in two; they were put to death by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated— 38the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, and in caves and holes in the ground.  39These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised. 40God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.

There are many attitudes, memories, unfulfilled expectations, and situations that daily ask me to bow to them. But I decided long ago that I will bow my knee to my God and my God alone.

 

So today I find myself quoting these amazing two words, “Even if…”

Even if I can’t see the future… I will not bow!

Even if I experience pain… I will not bow!

Even if I get scared… I will not bow!

Even if I don’t understand… I will not bow!

Even if it isn’t fair… I will not bow!

Even if it costs me my life… I will not bow!

Even if God does not do all that I think He should… to Him alone will I bow!

As you read Daniel, chapter 3, I challenge you to act as if it were you speaking to the king, and I want you to picture the king as being the very obstacle, habit, attitude, sin, or any other distraction from God’s plan you may be facing. In fact, fill in the blanks with your own name, attitude, sin, memory, pain, or life situation that currently stands before you.

"O _______________, I do not need to defend myself before you in this matter.  If I am thrown into the blazing furnace, the God I serve is able to save me from it, and He will rescue me from your hand, O ____________. But even if He does not, I want you to know, O ___________, that I will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up."

The Lord is a great God, with a great plan for your life. Run to Him and He will always be right there with you- no matter what brought you to the furnace you are facing. He is only a call away. He loves you, just as you are!

Timely Intrusions

Melissa and I were having a decent morning. All week long we had many conversations regarding our future: where to live, where to work, and what to do with ourselves. These conversations have some moments of fun and excitement (and silliness), but they were also stressful and left us seeking the Lord, hoping that He would just spell it out so clearly for us. That particular morning, we decided to leave a few minutes early to drop her off at Virginia Tech and stop at Starbucks to take advantage of her wonderful discount as an employee. When we walked in to Starbucks, the pastor from the church we are attending was sitting there with another pastor. His name is not important to the story, but for the record, he is a leader in our denomination and one of the leaders that I have always respected and appreciated. Melissa and I said hello and went outside to read our devotional. (Now remember that we have been praying for the Lord to speak to us. We are asking Him to make it so clear that we can’t possibly mess it up.)

We begin reading our devotion and the message is talking about walking through the fire and how the Lord is there with us through the flames.

Isaiah 48:10

See, I have refined you, though not as silver; I have tested you in the furnace of affliction.

The writings also spoke about the flames changing and reshaping us into looking more like our Lord. As Melissa and I talked and tried to apply this wonderful and yet painful truth, the visiting pastor came out and asked if he could share something with us. Of course we said, “NO!” Ok, not really. We invited in the intrusion and allowed him to speak into our lives. The words of wisdom, the vision, and encouragement he shared with us were exactly what we had just read. After he left, we had to laugh (that is after we stopped crying) because the Lord’s message was as clear and concise as it possibly could be.

Do you need the Lord to speak into your situation? Or do you just want reaffirmation that He is still present and cares that you are alive?

Here are some of the many ways that the Lord has intruded into my life to speak His words of encouragement…

1. The Bible
2. My times of solitude
3. My wife
4. My children
5. Friends & Family
6. Strangers passing by
7. Movies
8. Books
9. Dreams
10. Music
11. Beauty of Nature
12. Preachers
13. Worship
14. Prayer Times
15. Breathing

I hope you are beginning to get the picture that is being painted! The Lord will use everyone and everything to remind you of His love. He will actually meet you and intersect your life just how you need. The stories going through your mind of solitude and abandonment are pure lies. It is too easy to allow the depravity of circumstances, the world and its broken advice, and the twisted lies of Satan to convince us that the Lord is not near and that He does not even care. The Lord has done all that He can do to get your attention, and now it is up to you and I to step beyond the story that is being told and look for God’s fingerprints.

What is it about life’s storms that cause us to want to stop, stare and begin to run from every truth and promise? One of the most amazing parts of the Lord is how He has a way of getting our attention even when we do not know how to stop staring at the storm.

In closing, prepare your heart, as the Lord loves you so much that He has already planned how to intrude into your well laid out life this week and make Himself known once more.

By the way, the message that the Lord gave that day was for us to be patient and wait for Him. He was not done melting us down. This message from the Lord is not what I wanted to hear. But it is funny that it doesn’t upset me to continue sitting in the fire when I know He is there with me. I guess that is what Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednigo must have felt (Daniel 3)…  

Will you take a moment and tell me how the Lord has intruded into your life and made Himself known? I would love to hear a testimony out of your daily life.

To Hear

Mark 12:28
28. One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?”
29. “The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one.
30. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.
31. The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”
32. “Well said, teacher,” the man replied. “You are right in saying that God is one and
there is no other but him.
33. To love him with all your heart, with all your understanding and with all your strength, and to love your neighbor as yourself is more important than all burnt offerings and sacrifices.”

I have the honor of teaching a home bible study starting this week, so I have been studying this portion of scripture in order to spend a few months teaching through it. As I was studying the first portion of this scripture called the “Shema” (which means “to hear), the Lord began challenging me on my view of traditions and how I focus on Him daily.

If I was a good Jewish boy I would pray this portion of scripture as a prayer from memory at least twice a day--once at night and once in the morning.

Deuteronomy 6:4-9
Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. 6 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9 Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates.

The more that I have studied, prayed and pondered on the Shema I have come to this conclusion:

Too often, I allow my desire to not appear “religiously bound” as the excuse for being inconsistent with some of the most crucial elements of my walk with my Lord. Elements such as:

• Reading scripture consistently enough that I can quote it as well as some movies I have watched or music I have heard.

• Praying consistently enough that when the threat of a lion’s den or a fiery furnace comes our way, the only natural thing to do is to fall on my knees--just like every other day!

• Allowing the Holy Spirit to come and help me, not just when I think I am out of strength, but in every single moment of this life. Because what strength of our own do we really have anyway?

Here is what the Lord is showing me in this scripture as I try to truly HEAR what is being said:

“Hear me now Kristopher! I am God. I am beyond your understanding and have more compassion, love and power than your little mind can imagine. I am the one and only God! You have no need to fear, as I am here and above me there is NO other!”

I am not sure what you do on a daily basis to escape the fears of life and keep focused on the Lord, or how often you do it, but I am finding that I need to keep my life in His hands every moment of my day. It is when I begin staring at the details of life and its circumstances, and stop keeping my eyes on the Lord and His goodness, that things in my life quickly falls apart.

5 Steps to Hearing

1. Turn down the other noise!

We must consistently retreat from the loud distractions that we face on a daily basis.

2. Train your ear to know the Lord's voice!

The Lord's voice is distinct. But we must continue to train our ears or we may miss what He is trying to say...

3. Quit trying to multi-task!

It seems that our present day speed of life and technology has trained us that focusing in on one thing at a time is no longer worthwhile. So we attempt to do many things at once to keep our brains entertained. While we are seeking our Lord, we need to set things aside and give Him our full attention!

4. Listen even when we do not like what is being said!

As I watch my children tune me out each time I tell them to do a chore or finish a task, I am reminded of the many times that I have ignored the Lord and His promptings. It is almost like I have the ability to convince myself that He is not speaking at all, when Jesus went to the cross to assure that His message of love and hope would actually be heard.

5. In those moments when the Lord seems distant press in and stay consistent!

This is so important! It is through our consistency in focusing on the Lord and keeping our heart's desire to know and serve our Lord that we can survive the darkest night. The enemy of our souls would like us to believe that the Lord has deserted us and has nothing more to say. But it is in those hours of questioning that our faith grows and our testimonies about who our God is get polished!

Lord,

I pray for each person that will read this small teaching. I pray that, through the words that have been written, the reader would be challenged to set aside the agenda of his or her day and trade it for your plan. Please teach them how to hear your voice and how to hear your truth. The world tries to offer its version of truth, but the ideas are incomplete and broken. Keep the desire to know you and hear your direction on a moment-by-moment basis ever before myself and others.

Amen

Strength Unknown

"For I am crucified with Christ and yet I live

Not I but Christ that lives within me

His Cross will never ask for more than I can give

For its not my strength but His

There's no greater sacrifice

For I am crucified with Christ and yet I live"

Crucified with Christ- By Phillips, Craig & Dean

(This song is on my play list for your listening pleasure.)

I was at work setting up my food-service station, listening to worship and just focusing on the Lord, when the song "Crucified for Christ" came on. I have heard this song many times but I am not sure I ever listened to the words or the message. But as the song played, my heart and my spirit felt as if they grew and became stronger. Spiritual steroids will never be a topic that I will preach; but the understanding that the Lord will not ask me for more than I can give hit me so hard. The thought of this truth is even bringing tears to my eyes as I type this right now. You see, I have always preached and tried to live out the idea that is taught in Luke chapter 9--

Luke 9:23

Then he said to them all: "If anyone would come after me,

he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me."

There have been times that bearing this cross has been so overwhelming that the idea of ridding myself of the burden of it seemed the only way to survive the crushing weight. However, this cross that we have been asked to bear can and will only be manageable through the strength of our Creator. The cross will never ask more of me than He, my Lord, will give me strength for. So what does this mean? How does this play out in my day to day living?

• When the tapestry of this life seems to be ripping in pieces with no hope for the future--He will hold this life together. In fact, He has already laid out the future! He already knows what that tapestry will look like and it makes Him smile.

• When relationships become strained and we feel surrounded by a sea of sadness--He can bring wholeness and give us a reason to smile once more!

• When the way has been lost and darkness has surrounded us--He will be our light and lead us back to the right path!

• When all of those promises seem broken and breathing seems difficult--He will show us the way!

• When what we have earned has been stripped of us and we feel unprotected and naked--He will guard us and wrap us in His arms of true protection!

During this last week, I was spending some time worshipping the Lord and He broke my heart for Him once more. You see, during this season of my life, my brain keeps coming up with the idea that the Lord is not paying attention to me and is not walking with me the way I think He should. My heart tells me differently but, in moments of weakness, my brain wins out and I find that some of my days are sadder than they should be. But the Lord reminded me--and also wants to remind you--that He is right there with us. He is walking through every storm and every situation. Just because life has its obstacles and tragedies does not mean that He is not present. Our God never once promised to save us from every heartache that we would face. Instead, He promises to never leave us or forsake us. He promises to give us strength in our weakest hours. He promises to give us joy and hope to replace the darkness and pain. Last February, I wrote a song about these feelings I have had and, as I was playing it this week, it was like the Lord reached over and gave me a big hug. This may sound a bit strange, but it was very real to me, and I hope that as you read these words, you might have that same experience. Our God is real and His love is amazing! I think our biggest problem is that we all have spiritual amnesia and too easily forget who our God is and what He has done for us. Here are the words...

Where Were You?

By Kristopher Dahir

(My questions)

Where were you when the storms came calling my name?

Where were you when my life had darkness and shame?

Where were you when my world was full of blame?

Where were you? Where were you? Where were you?

Where were you when the fog and the flood poured in?

Where were you when the night was dark and so dim?

Where were you when my heart was broken again?

Where were you? Where were you? Where were you?

(The Lord's response)

I was there with my arms reaching to you.

Calling your name, calming your fears.

I am here don’t you fear, my child, my love

I am here, I am here, I am here!

I was there when the storms came calling your name.

I was there through all of the darkness and shame.

I was there when your world was filled with blame.

I was there, I was there, I was there!

I was there when the fog and the flood poured in.

I was there when your night was dark and so dim.

I was there when your heart was broken again.

I was there, I was there, I was there!

(My response)

You were there with your arms reaching to me.

Calling my name., calming my fears.

You were there I won’t fear, my God and my King.

You were there, you were there you were there!

(My challenge to you)

He is here with His arms reaching to you.

Calling your name, calming your fears.

He is hear don’t you fear, He’s your God and your King.

He is here, He is here, so don’t fear!

May God bless you this week. Whatever you face, remember that you are NOT alone! In closing, I am going to steal an excerpt out of a devotional that my wife and I read together. This devotional is talking about guidance and God's ultimate plan for us by looking at the life of Joseph out of the book of Genesis chapter 50.

"Joseph's brothers had sold him into slavery. It was an unexpected turn, especially in light of the dreams he had recently had. Joseph wasn't off track. The plans of his brothers for harm fit with the plans of God for good. Though everyone involved was quite unaware of God's hand, their steps were ordained by Him. He had seen the whole tragedy ahead of time and woven His plan into it. Or He had seen the plan and woven the tragedy into it. We're not sure exactly how His sovereignty operates in the self-will of humanity, but know that it does. Even when life throws the unexpected at us, it is never unexpected for God. He always has a plan." 

Written by Chris Tiegreen

Simple Pleasures

Why does life get so complicated that we allow the most precious moments we have to pass us by so quickly? This week the Lord is reminding me that He wants me to spend time in His presence. No, He doesn’t want me to sing to Him. And no, that is not because my voice hurts Him--he actually loves my singing (if you can believe that!). He is not asking me to spend more time reading His Word, though He knows how beneficial that can be. He is, however, asking me to simply hang with Him. As a father, I can relate with His request. I love when my kids just want to sit and talk. Or maybe we even just sit there on our porch swing, not even saying a word, but just watching the sunset, allowing it to warm our hearts. Just yesterday, I was talking to my son Noah and, though he may drive me crazy at times, he is such an impressive young man. As I sat and listened to him ramble about what was going on in that simple and yet complex mind of his, I came to the conclusion that it didn’t matter what he was saying or how much sense he made. The only thing that I cared about is that my son wanted to talk to me. My son took time away from wanting to play video games, eat food, play with our doggy, read, play outside and whatever else to spend time with his dad. Man, did that make me smile!

I believe our Lord feels the same way. When we come to Him, we do not have to say everything correctly, wear the "right" type of clothes, or even make sense out of the ramblings of our heart. He just loves that we long to be with Him.

This may sound very strange, but I am much more comfortable with all of the ritualistic ways that I have relationship with the Lord than I am with just spending time with Him. Growing up in church since I was 7 years old, and pastoring for the last 15 years, has taught me that the main ways to approach God are through worship, prayer and reading His Word. There is nothing wrong with these forms of spending time with the Lord, but they can be very limiting to a deep relationship if we cannot press farther than the guidelines of religiosity that we have learned.

Let me explain: Have you ever thought about heaven? There are many people who think heaven is going to be so very boring because all they are going to do is worship and sing the whole time. This type of thinking spawns from the idea that God is only approachable through certain forms or methods. What if spending time with the Lord could come in the form of fishing and enjoying nature, sitting and reading a good book together, watching a football game, eating a great meal, or going for a run? This all may sound like the Virginia air has officially broken down my mental capacities, but I assure you, it is quite the opposite. I have never in my life had things laid out so simply.

The only life that is worth living will be found in surrender to the Lord. It truly does not matter what we face as long as we are resting in His loving arms.

Psalm 23 A psalm of David.

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

3 he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.

4 Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.

6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

I have read this scripture so many times and I am not sure until today that I have truly understood most of it. This scripture is probably one of the most read and memorized scriptures in all of the Bible, but is also probably one of the most ignored.

Let's just begin with the first verse. "The Lord is my shepherd I shall not be in want."

Have you been in want? I hate to say it, but I can't say that I have been around a human being--including myself--who knows how to do this. Our biggest problems in life stem from these corrupted desires that sink into our hearts and then are slowly rationalized by our mind until they give full birth to action. If we could just be content with our Good Shepherd, then our lust for things would stop hurting those we love and causing damage to our own personal lives.

Though we could spend a lot of time just talking about the first verse, today's teaching is more focused on verse 2.

"He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet water, He restores my soul."

This scripture is not about religious attempts to know a distant God. This scripture is about an intimate relationship that has no bounds. It is about a God who loves you the most and a God who loves me the most. Due to some life circumstances, I have had to face some personal insecurities that I thought I had buried so deep no one would ever find them. They were buried so deep that I actually thought they did not exist. Boy, was I wrong! Not only do they exist, but they actually seem tired of not being able to express themselves, and are fighting to make themselves heard. My first response to these insecurities was to try to push them back down in the grave I tried to bury them in years ago. Then I tried to fight them with all of the wisdom and strength I had... yes, I lost that battle quickly. As I was coming to the end of my strength and sanity, the Lord, once again, as He has done so many times in my life, invited me into His chambers and, with all of the love that I know of, asked me if I was finished. What could this mean? Was I finished? Did this mean I was too weak to complete the task at hand? He then went on to ask if I was finished trying to convince myself, my family, my friends, my church, and my God that I was strong enough to hold myself together. And He was right! I was finished! He then reminded me that all that was required of me was to sit at His feet and He would give me the strength, peace, hope, joy and anything else that might be needed to face life's circumstances.

I am here today to tell you that the Lord is my Shepherd. I am doing all I can to not want for anything but Him. I am relaxing in His presence in the greenest pastures that I have ever lived in. And yes, He is restoring my soul!

Trying to Hide

Imagine that you are being asked to step up and take part in the very thing that you have been avoiding every day of your life since you can remember. At this point, you don't even remember why it is that you have feared this day; but the few times that you have come close to this predicament, you have felt your blood pressure begin to raise, your hands get a little balmy, your throat tightens just enough that your voice would come out a bit strained if you had to speak, and your head would began to spin as if a very bad case of vertigo had set in. This thing you fear is the same for every human being walking this earth--but no one really talks about. Each individual keeps walking around, day by day, as if no one could understand or possibly relate to the tumultuous fear that haunts them. What is this thing that is feared at times more than even death? It is the fear that someone might find out who we really are and what really goes on inside of our most secret of places--our hearts and minds!

1 Peter 3:14b-15

"Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened."15But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord."

So what is it that you fear the most? Have you ever really sat down and thought about it? Scripture admonishes us to not fear what they fear. It tells us to not be frightened.

Wouldn't it be amazing if when we gave our life to the Lord, that immediately all of our fears dissolved? I remember being a young man and being scared of the dark. I remember watching the movie "The Shining," and being so terrified that I was afraid to go to the bathroom by myself! I remember being asked to get up in front of the class to share my project and wanting to run out of the room out of fear of making a fool of myself. I remember asking that special girl to go to homecoming with me just hoping that she would say, "Yes." How scary that was! I remember the day I got married and the fear in my heart that I would let down this beautiful gift that the Lord has given me. I remember the fear of my first sermon preached wondering if the Lord was going to strike me dead for blasphemy. I remember the day that my wife was giving birth to my son and because of complications my imagination started telling me that I was going to leave the hospital without a child and maybe without a wife. These were all fearful times that were difficult to face, but as I ran to the Lord, He helped me through each one. Now I am a grown man and have seen the Lord do many miracles. My faith supposedly has grown to a place where I am to be an example for others; yet I still find myself wanting to curl up in a ball out of fear. Not fear of other people, not fear of failure, not even fear of the future. What scares me the most is the fear of facing what is residing inside of me. Fear that the Lord will find out who I really am. Fear that the Lord will find out that I don't really trust Him.

I have been reading a book called "The Shack," written by William P. Young. It has been quite a difficult book for me to read, but it has caused me to face many things that are residing inside of my mind and heart. At one point in the book there is a conversation between the main character, Mackenzie, and God. God told this man what his real problem was and, I hate to say it, but I think it is my problem as well.

"The real underlying flaw in your life, Mackenzie, is that you don't think I am good. If you knew I was good and that everything- the means, the ends, and all the processes of individual lives- is all covered by my goodness, then, while you might not always understand what I am doing, you would trust me. But you don't." God finishes this thought with these words. "Trust is the fruit of a relationship where you know you are loved. Because you don't know that I love you, you cannot trust me."

After reading this part of the book, I wanted to throw it across the room. Who would write a book that has so much naked truth in it? However, instead of throwing the book, I dropped to my knees and cried out to Him. I want to know and trust my God. I would like to be able to give you 10 steps to know God's love or some kind of formula that will produce the desired result of knowing and trusting God, but I don't know them. There is one step that I do know to do, and I am trying to do it every day--sit at Jesus's feet and ask Him to continue to show you His love.

As I sit here tonight writing to you, please know that there is a smile on my face. I actually think that maybe, for the first time in a long time, I do not feel any pressure to be anything or anyone but one of God's children. There is no longer a reason to hide, because I know my Father simply loves me for me!